Well, at the suggestion of the GI nurse (not the military kind, however), I finally opened the mysterious package that I ordered for $30.50 from the “Colon Prep Center”. I was reluctant to look inside and left it on the bathroom shelf. But today begins the five day countdown, so I carefully carried to the table, and opened it.
Inside was a big medicine bottle, a stapled sheaf of instructions with the receipt, and odd and ends in a Ziplock® package. But, hallelujah! Nothing was made of rubber.
1 – 8.3 oz. bottle of Polyethylene Glycol 3350. Also called Miralax. It turns a nice firm stool into a high velocity brown stream.
5 – Bisacodyl tablets (but I am only supposed to take 4. So why did they send five. Hmmm? You call them Ducolax.
3 – Sugar free drink mix packets … to mix into a Polyethylene Glycol cocktail.
5 – individually wrapped aloe flushable wipes by Pure Touch® … called “Tush Wipes” in case there is any confusion as to how to use them.
1 – Complementary box lemon Jello®
3 – Complementary packets of chicken broth
1 – pkt of forms, instructions and receipts.
But, did I mention: Nothing was made of rubber nor designed to be inserted?!
Much of the above is mixed into a quart pitcher of that I will drink half of at four in the afternoon the day before, and get up at three am to finish it off. Somehow, I think I shant need to set an alarm.
In the morning, Snookums will drive me to town and into the hospital parking lot, ride up the elevator to the “laboratory” (it better have a lavatory as well!), I’ll be given a “strong” sedative, and the procedure begins. From their webpage http://www.colonprepcenter.com
Once you are comfortable in the proper position, your doctor will begin by performing a gentle finger examination of your rectum wearing a clean, lubricated glove. Then the flexible endoscope will be lubricated and placed inside. You will feel a little pressure when this happens. The endoscope is then carefully moved up through your rectum and colon.
I was going to include some bowl samples, but Snookums said that I probably gave you enough information already. So there you have it. Another of life’s indignities in the aging process.