Resolution
… then one morning I woke and knew that the skirmishes were over. I was joined in a battle to death. The lawn became unimportant. The dust bunnies in the kitchen weren’t going away. The carpet wasn’t going to get cleaned. The shed is not going to be emptied. The tools aren’t going to get sorted.
The day is fast approaching when I will not be able to protect my wife, and I will leave her to the care of others just at the time she needed me most. It is a bitter pill to swallow.
Yet I have each day, and each day adds to each day. I must concentrate on those things that are good and necessary before the darkness arrives.
But all that is left is the struggle.
Rusty's Armory 
May 8, 2022 at 3:15 pm
Oh, my dear friend, I didn’t want to read this any more than I expect you wanted to write it. Is it really this bad, or is today just an especially bad day? I’d like to say, chin up, tomorrow will be better, you have many, many good years in your future, but I don’t know if that’s true. Worse, you KNOW I don’t know – and even if you didn’t, I’m not sure I could bring myself to lie to you, knowing you would recognize the lie. I WANT tomorrow to be better, I WANT there to be a multitude of happy years ahead of you, so I will say some prayers for that, and hold tight to hope.
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May 8, 2022 at 3:37 pm
I wrote it a bit more stronger than the reality. But I am watching Snookums slow descent into senility. It will still be awhile, but I have it set up that I can follow her car on her weekly shopping trip on my computer, and taught her how to use the home button on the GPS.
And I am so weak now … even the simplest task fatigues me. I would not be in any shape to tend to her should that happen …
It could take several years before the final insult arrives, but it is time steel my mind …
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May 9, 2022 at 12:47 am
I am sorry to hear of your struggles. Do you have children that could help?
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May 9, 2022 at 9:58 am
I have a niece and brother that I specifically asked to live with us because I wanted someone to look after the animals if something were to happen to us. I don’t know how prepared they would be to look after a senile old woman, though …
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May 10, 2022 at 1:22 am
Goodness. I hope all will work out.
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May 8, 2022 at 8:14 pm
life is the struggle, the resting comes after…struggle on my friend
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May 9, 2022 at 5:56 am
We watched my MIL slowly fade mentally and I know how heartbreaking it can be. I wish I had some words of comfort to offer that could ease your pain. Please know you are in my thoughts…
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May 9, 2022 at 6:23 am
God gives us life and life betrays our bodies in so many ways. Keep the faith, my friend. You are loved.
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May 9, 2022 at 11:48 am
This is too difficult for me to make a comment at the moment, but wanted you to know I was here and I care. ❤
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